Da Di

Happy Undas Pilipinas! And in the spirit of the occasion, I bring you this story about my dead dad (should we just call him deadpa?). It's my last dream of him from two years ago (he's been dead seven years then) that I thought I'd resurrect here and now. In it dad is throwing a house blessing party for our new home, an apartment-type that looks eerily like the one we now call home and not at all like the proper house we used to live in when dad was still alive. (Hindi na naabutan ng tatay ko ang balay na ito.) The scene takes place in the living room at the start of the party. Dad is by the main door giving a speech. It starts out predictably, boringly enough with some welcome remarks. Then he tells everyone how happy he was that the entire family was there and how he hopes that the new home will be a happier place for all of us. It's here when father starts to become emotional. It's also here when the comedy begins. As tears start to well from dad's eyes somebody lets out a big, fat, loud fart. Everyone hears this except, it seems, my old man. Out of deference to dad we all do our darndest best to stifle our laughter. Most of us are able to keep it to ourselves and those that aren't are at least able to keep the volume down. Then a few moments later one of my plumpier aunts leans a bit too heavily on one of the cocktail tables, causing it to tilt over and throwing off all the pastry on it including the big round party cake in the middle. She tries to salvage it but only manages to dig her hands as deep as the layer of thick white icing on it. Aunt's eyes enlarge and look as though they're about to pop out from mortification but her face lightens up and her lips widen into a devilish grin. She then puts out her tongue and starts devouring the icing off her fingers. More stifled laughter. Dad, meanwhile, remains unperturbed, pausing only to wipe away his tears as he continues to blabber on. And then -- and then! -- just as dad seems on the verge of breaking down, the kids playing outside the house suddenly decide to go for a change of playground. They kick the door open, slamming it on dad's face, and barge into the living room laughing and screaming. Quickly realizing there isn't much ground for them to play in inside the house, the kids promptly dash back out. Again slamming the door on father's face. This time stifling proves futile and everybody erupts into wild laughter. Me included. In fact I laughed so hard I literally woke myself up from that dream. Mas lalo akong natawa. At nahirapan na ako matulog.